Monday, February 14, 2011

Two cats, a husband and a baby: Love, actually

It took a nine hour date to seal the deal.  All of which was spent sipping a single malt (Glenmorangie, 12 years), talking (some), listening (a lot) and watching a Don DVD (of course, the old one, what were you thinking?).

Now if you know my attention span is worse than that of my 20 month-old, that must have been a big deal.

It happened when it didn’t matter whether or not it happened. I was, at that point, having the greatest love affair of my life – the one with myself. Yes, I am gorgeous, but it took me a long time and many wrong guys to fall in love with myself. When I finally did, along came the one.

I found many shallow reasons to write him off. The fact that he looked too young (I thought at that point that he was the younger sibling of the girl who introduced us). The fact that he had an American accent (diplobrat=American schools=funny, mixed up accent of no fixed address). The fact that he couldn’t cook. The fact that he couldn’t remember the last book he read. The fact that had never watched a play. The fact that he didn’t play any real sport. The fact that none of his friendships dated more than four years. The fact that he was technically, an alien in my city.

And then I found one solid reason not to. The fact that he totally got me. The fact that he made me laugh. The fact that he still does.

Now, many of you may find the sense of humour thing a bit overrated, but it is the one thing that can keep a marriage going. And when the baby comes, oh my god, you need it real bad.

I don’t understand very long engagements or very orchestrated ones. The best marriages I know are where neither party has officially proposed or been proposed to. He chickened out on proposing to me at an Indigo brunch, where he set the mood for me to expect it. Only to do so in the cab ride back home. It was funny.

He: May be we could do this forever.
Me: You mean brunch?
He:  No, I mean us.
Me: Ha ha, you are funny.
He: Is that a yes?
Me: Well, okay.

I reminded him it was a good thing I wasn’t into rocks and bent knees and all that jazz.  He thought that made me cooler.

A year and some later, we were married.

Four years, four mistresses ( a PS2, a PS3, a PSP and an Xbox), two cats and a baby later, I am still enjoying the ride.

Happy Valentine’s day to all.


  1. I totally agree about the sense of humour part. It is definitely one of the most important ingredients of a good marriage. My husband always manages to break me up when I am sulking after a fight with his silly jokes and mimicries. :)

  2. Hey Lalita,

    I missed your column for almost a year now. After you stopped writing in Hindustan Times, i looked you up on the Internet n couldn't find fresh articles by you anywhere (even on this blog). Eventually, i thought you have quit and left India or something! :P Anyways, i just discovered your site today at work (since i have absolutely no work to do today!)...and I'm thrillled!

    Your articles are hilarious and your mommy ones are even better!

  3. But its more a case of "be-careful-what you-wish-for" coz yes my husband manages to charm me at all times, except when we're having a fight and i'm all red-eyed and flared nostrils and medusa-like and he jus starts making jokes or singing!!!! Its annoying i tell you! Give me my right to a proper fight!

  4. ha ha, thanks isha. The column has been a blog since november, and i usually post at least once a week...
    purple spirit... i never get to the flared nostrils stage, coz mine either hides or makes me crack up. i dunno which one is worse

  5. Haha, this was a great read! You're a lucky woman and you know it :)

  6. thanks manali.. i never forget to count my blessings!

  7. Bless You Both, the two cats, the four mistresses and the lovely Baby :)